FAQ       Archive      Extras       Gallery
       Links       Subscribe

Nadja Lee

She's All I Ever Had

Published: 06/08/01
English is not my native language. Please forgive me my mistakes.
Disclaimer: "X-men" and all the characters here belong to Marvel , 20 Century Fox and I intend no infringement, 
this is a piece of amateur fan fiction, and I make no money of it.

Disclaimer: " She's All I Ever Had" was sung by Ricky Martin and the song belong to him, the record 
company and the song writers. I intend no infringement, this is a piece of amateur 
fan fiction and I make no money of it.

Only the original idea contained within this work is the property of the author. Please do not copy 
this story to any website or archive without permission of the author.
Timeline: Set in the comic universe. After Scott's and Jean's wedding.
Universe: Set in comic universe.
Romance: Scott/Jean
Summary:  Scott thinks about Jean and what she means to him
Archiving: Want, ASK, take,  have.
Feedback: Yes, please. (Use Feedback Button)
Rating: G

Sequel/series: Probably not.

*mmmm * is telepathically thoughts spoken in the mind. " mmmmm "  is spoken out loud.

Part 1:
I remember when I saw her the first time; so young, so beautiful..so innocent. For as long as I can remember she was all I ever wanted. She is fire, she is love, she is...she is Jean, my love. She is as necessary to me as the air I breathe, I remember telling her so once. It took so long for us to be together, I was too shy and too afraid. Luckily she was neither; not only did she steal the first kiss but she was also the one to propose. As she lies here besides me in bed, her long hair spread out over the pillow I'm sure no one can be more perfect; the most beautiful of creatures, the most gorgeous of creations.

Over the years we have been through so much, life, death and everything in between. She calls me strong for all I have lived through but I wonder if she knows that I'm only strong because I have her? She is the true leader, the true heart of the X-men. Without her I'm like a ship without a captain; drifting aimlessly at sea.

I touch her flaming fire hair; it is smooth and soft as silk. Gods, I love her hair, love to run my fingers through it. Drives her crazy sometimes when I ask her if I can brush her hair for her or when she once wanted to cut her hair short; I did nothing less than forbid it which didn't go over well until she had cooled down a bit. My eyes soften as they always do when I look at her. She looks so peaceful in sleep; so perfect. And she's all mine. To this day I still can't believe she actually choose me, that she married me.

She is all I never had. She is my friend, my mother, my support, my lover, my wife; she is everything I ever need. She was my fist love, she will be my last. She is all I never had.

Her powers are awe-inspiring but her power over my heart are the most powerful of them all. The bond we share will never break for I can't let her go. We aren't two people but one. She is the other part of me, the other part of my soul; without her I am incomplete. My hands brush lightly over hers and even in her sleep she closes her hands over mine, holding them safe and close. She has always done that; she has lead me home, guided me when I got lost. She is the dream I follow, she is the light in my world. She could destroy worlds with a thought but in her arms I know; I'll always be safe.

Someone once told me our relationship would never work because we were so different but they are wrong; to every darkness there must be light, to every pain there are love, to every man there is a woman just for him and I know that I have found mine. I would die for her, I would even kill for her; anything to see her safe for she is everything to me; she is all I ever had.

I have never had a lot of love in my life but with Jean by my side I need no greater love because she IS love. Even now in her sleep her thoughts and feelings of love lies as a warm and comforting blanket over my soul and mind. No matter how far part we may wander we will always find each other again; I know that now because we are linked together by love, by our hearts in a bond that can never be broken.

She turns in her sleep and I gently wipe some loose hair out of her eyes. My heart fills with love for this woman and I hold her close to me. I lost her once but got her back; I will never loose her again.

Through all these years she has stood by my side, no matter what happened I could always count on her; she has always supported and trusted me; always loved me. She is all I ever need. She is all I ever had.

When I look into her eyes, I know it is forever. The image her eyes reflects back at me makes me want to be a man she can be proud off, makes me strike to be the best. The way she makes me feel; it's the only thing which is constant, which is real. When she smiles my heart melts. When she laugh I laugh with her, if she should cry I'll be there to wipe away her tears and make everything alright again. She is the air I breathe, she is the one I live for; she is my love, she is my life. She is all I ever had.

I lean close to her, my warm breath caresses her cheek. Such beauty, such perfection....such love, such compassion. She has the appearance of a fragile China doll, making me want to hold her close and protect her forever but I know; she is Phoenix, truly fire and life incarnate, at least she is my fire and life incarnate. She holds the world up on her shoulders and my heart in her hands. Without her I'll be truly lost. Without her I'll be truly gone. Without her...I'll have no reason to go on and I know; should I loose her again....I shall not.

She presses closer to me in her sleep and I caresses her cheek ever so softly before I bend down and plant a light kiss to her forehead. She is so many things to me but most of all; she is love. Even before we met I loved her; I loved my firebird; her warmth was never burning, it was healing, her fire was never dangerous, it was filled with love. My firebird..my salvation, my support....my love, my wife.

She is everything to me.

She is everything I ever need.

She is all I ever had.

The End


<Other Stories By Nadja Lee>

Return To The Archive